Being cheated on is one of the most hurtful, gut wrenching things that can happen to a relationship – but it doesn’t necessarily mean that the relationship is over if neither partner wants to end it. Here’s how to move through being cheated on and start living life again.
Why Did He Cheat?
Take a look at what was behind the adultery or what caused it to happen. Was he drunk? Was it an accident because his judgment was impaired? Or is he cheating regularly with one or more women? Beginning to understand what is behind the cheating is the first step to figuring out whether it’s something that is forgivable – or not.
Can He be Forgiven?
He got drunk. She came on to him. He won’t do it again. Many women force themselves to be hard on their cheating partners on principle, even if inside they feel love and forgiveness. If it doesn’t seem like a big deal, don’t treat it like one.
On the other hand, if he was cheating for several months with another “girlfriend,” it might be necessary to ask him what in the world he was thinking.
Trusting Him Again
Yes, he’ll need to earn trust back again. Does this mean calling him every 5 seconds or stalking him when he leaves work for the evening? Not exactly. He made a mistake and he wants to work it out. Let him, but stay on the lookout for anything obviously amiss.
Kicking Him to The Curb
He’s a jerk and it’s time to move on to bigger and better things. Let him know that infidelity isn’t something that is needed right now. Understand that it’s every woman’s right to decide what they do or don’t want in a relationship and everyone has the right to be happy. If it’s time to move on, move on and don’t let anyone say that a woman is obligated in any way to stay in a relationship or try to work something out that she doesn’t want to.
The emotional pain that comes from being cheated on is something that’s going to burn for a long time. It’s okay to feel that pain. Whether the relationship is still intact or whether the relationship is over, being cheated on isn’t something that is easily forgettable. Feel free to grieve for the betrayal, but don’t get caught up in it or become obsessed with it. After all, there is life after cheating.